Fwd: Fw: Men are from Mars & Men are from ????
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How To Shower Like a Woman:
a.. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according
to lights and darks.
b.. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband
along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the
mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
c.. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long
loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
d.. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
vitamins. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. Condition your hair
with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.
e.. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes
until red.
f.. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
g.. Rinse conditioner off hair.
h.. Shave armpits and legs. Turn off shower.
i.. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with
Tilex.
j.. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
k.. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
l.. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.If
you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
HOW TO SHOWER IF YOU'RE A MAN
a.. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them
in a pile.
b.. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake
wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
c.. Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
d.. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass.
e.. Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits.
f.. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
g.. Fart and chuckle at how loud it sounds in the shower.
h.. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
i.. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
j.. Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
k.. Pee.
l.. Rinse off and get out of shower.
m.. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was
hanging out of tub the whole time.
n.. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
o.. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
p.. Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
q.. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the
'woo-woo' sound again.
r.. Throw wet towel on bed.
Is there anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this?
----- End forwarded message -----
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